Google issues Apple streaming spoiler
Published in News
Wednesday, 24 June 2015 12:31

Google issues Apple streaming spoiler


Launches its own music streaming service

The Search Engine Google has forced the fruity retailer of overpriced toys onto the back foot by releasing a free version of its music streaming service for a fraction of the price.

Apple's next iPhone will be thicker
Published in Mobiles
Tuesday, 23 June 2015 13:32

Apple's next iPhone will be thicker


Just like its users

Taiwan's top Apple analyst has released a prediction that the next iPhones will be thicker than the last—0.2 mm thicker.

Beats headphones' obscene margins
Published in News
Tuesday, 23 June 2015 11:38

Beats headphones' obscene margins


Apple overlords are amateurs

When Fruity Cargo Cult Apple bought Beats headphones it was not clear how much of a marriage in hell the arrangement was. While Apple was famous for its obscenely high profit margins it was a bunch of amateurs in comparison to Dr Dre.

Apple kills off the vintage iPad mini
Published in News
Monday, 22 June 2015 11:41

Apple kills off the vintage iPad mini


People didn't want it

Apple has made the admission that people don't want the "original" iPad mini and have killed it off.

Samsung appears to copy Apple's security ability
Published in News


Has a scary bug

More than 600 million Samsung phones may be vulnerable to attacks that allow hackers to surreptitiously monitor the camera and microphone, read incoming and outgoing text messages, and install malicious apps.

Apple pulls Monster's licence
Published in News
Thursday, 18 June 2015 11:37

Apple pulls Monster's licence


How dare you sue us!

Jobs' Mob has shown its petty side after it pulled the licence for Monster Cable to make expensive wires for its expensive toys.

Apple puts iWatch in stores
Published in Wearables
Wednesday, 17 June 2015 12:23

Apple puts iWatch in stores


Maybe some idiot will buy them

Apple mysteriously has enough iWatches on hand to start putting them in its own stores.

Apple is convicted of playing monopoly
Published in News
Wednesday, 17 June 2015 11:39

Apple is convicted of playing monopoly


Go directly to jail do not collect $200

Fruity cargo cult Apple has found that its anti-competitive practices of forcing telcos to do what they are told do not go down well in Taiwan.

New York Times damns iWatch
Published in Wearables
Monday, 15 June 2015 16:36

New York Times damns iWatch


Writing is on the wall after Apple loses key Ally

In a sign that the end is near for the iWatch, the New York Times has admitted that it is rubbish.

Xiaomi sells 6 million Mi Bands
Published in News
Monday, 15 June 2015 13:49

Xiaomi sells 6 million Mi Bands


$13 fitness band kicking iWatch to death

Although you will not see it in the Tame Apple Press, in China Xiaomi is flogging shedloads of fitness bands for $13.