Steve Jobs saw iPod shuffle as a “gateway drug”
Published in News


Got you hooked on the cult

Steve Jobs saw the iPod shuffle as a cheap way of getting young kids hooked on the Apple cult.

Apple shows how to spin bad news
Published in News
Wednesday, 02 August 2017 06:00

Apple shows how to spin bad news


Falling profits, lower sales, chinese outlook bleak – press still goes mental

The fruity, tax-dodging, cargo-cult Apple managed to convince the world’s press it was doing ok despite falling iPhone sales, declines in China and a fall in profits by 14.6 percent.

Apple stuffed up the design of its space-ship
Published in News


Great for marketing – a nightmare for developers 

While the Tame Apple Press has been banging on about the wonderful the design of the new Apple $5 billion HQ , there are signs that it is not good for company developers.

HP patents reminder messages
Published in News
Tuesday, 01 August 2017 10:27

HP patents reminder messages


More HP sauce 

The maker of over-priced printer ink, HP, has just decided that it invented reminder messages and has scored itself a patent from the daft US Patent Office.

Five stupid thieves arrested in daring $590,000 iPhone heist
Published in Mobiles


That is only about a dozen phones


Five extremely stupid Romanians carried out a daring raid from a moving truck to steal $590,000 worth of iPhones.

Apple surrenders and agrees to pay Nokia
Published in News


Pays $2 billion that it owed.

It appears that all that rubbish that Apple spouted about the former rubber boot maker Nokia was completely untrue and the fruity-cargo cult has written a cheque for $2 billion dollars to provide the Finns with the money they are owed.

Apple helps Chinese spy on fanboys
Published in News
Monday, 31 July 2017 12:57

Apple helps Chinese spy on fanboys


What are friends for?

The fruity-cargo cult Apple has aligned itself with the Chinese government against its users.

Apple kills the iPod
Published in News
Friday, 28 July 2017 06:00

Apple kills the iPod


Only the Touch is left 

Apple has now officially killed off all its iPods, other than the Touch which was more of an iPhone without the ability to call someone.

Apple nicked WARF’s ideas
Published in Mobiles
Wednesday, 26 July 2017 06:00

Apple nicked WARF’s ideas


Jobs' Mob found guilty of being without honour

The fruity cargo-cult Apple, which insists that it invented the rounded rectangle, has been found guilty of stealing a US university’s technology.

Qualcomm fires back at Computer & Communications Industry Association
Published in News


Misdirecting regulators

Qualcomm slammed a trade body which commented on its licencing dispute with Apple, saying that the Computer & Communications Industry Association was waging a "coordinated effort aimed at misdirecting" trade regulators.