Front people named as secret minutes revealed
The fruity cargo cult, Apple’s mission to lower the standards of the world hit a new “high” today after it announced which celebs were going to host their new self-reverential app developer “reality” show. Gwyneth Paltrow, will.i.am have been named as the celebrities which will add weight to “Planet of the Apps.” It seems such a strange decision that we asked one of our Apple deep throats to find us the minutes of the meeting where it was made. We provide it verbatim:
27,000 PCs still run the ancient software
More than 27,000 PCs in use by London’s Metropolitan Police are running Windows XP despite an IT modernisation programme and fears that it makes them vulnerable to hackers.
Price fixing allegations
Fruity cargo cult Apple's arrogant attitude to its business partners might have earned it a price fixing court case in Tsar Putin's Russia.
Dancing with the devils
Samsung is spending millions of dollars pushing its upcoming Galaxy Note 7 tablet in the USA and thinks that hiring Austrian film star Christopher Waltz to mock how busy citizens already are will help persuade Americans to favour a Korean product over Apple offerings.
It is just too expensive
Apple’s hopes that it might prolong the life of its sacred cash cow the iPhone in India are proving false.
Fanboys are revolting
A while back Apple took the Nintendo out of those who owned five year old PCs calling them “sad people”. However, the fruity cargo cult is now peddling “new” computers which are that august age and even Apple fanboys are screaming “hey we are not THAT sad.”
Just a pity they are not paying tax
The US economy might be being propped up by the success of technology heavyweights.
Hard to find a good guy in this story
Apple's billion dollar investment in car-hailing app Didi Chuxing in May helped kick Uber out of China.
Smaller screens are done
Samsung Electronics Mobile Communications Business President Koh Dong-jin said the company will work to keep the large screen smartphone in the mainstream, despite claims that Apple’s attempts to bring smaller screens back have had some small success.