Still yet to make any impact

A decade ago, Apple's spiritual head Steve Jobs promised Apple fanboys that his brand new tablet gizmo would change the world – it didn't thanks mostly to limited software and simple evolution of mobile tech.

Cargo cult sends in the nerds to evangelise the gym

As if Fudzilla readers needed a reason to skip going to the gym, the fruity cargo cult Apple has announced an evangelisation programme targeting gym users and it is getting the gyms to pay for it.

Will no one think of the poor Apple fanboys?

Fruity cargo cult Apple has decided to fight  EU lawmakers' call for a common charger,  not because it will stop it making huge amounts of money from fiddling with plugs to force an upgrade, but because poor Apple fanboys will suffer.

Now the ghost of Steve Jobs will have to find another reason why Safari keeps breaking

More than a decade ago, Apple's High Priest Steve Jobs moaned that Flash was responsible for things breaking in his software.  Now, it seems Apple is ending all connection with the software which appears to have outlasted Jobs himself.

Thanks to software designed to protect their privacy

The software genii at Apple have moved from creating clock software which cannot adjust to summertime to building anti-tracking software which allows users to be tracked.

It will probably have a rotary dial

The dark satanic rumour mill has manufactured a hell on earth yarn that claims the fruity cargo cult Apple is thinking of putting out a “cheap” mobile phone.

Appears to have caved to FBI pressue

Apple quickly caved to FBI pressure and decided not to encrypt iCloud backups a couple of years ago. Thank goodness nobody would ever try hacking an iCloud account to get compromising photos or data.

Apple's buy out of Xnor.ai has put it in trouble

Apple's recent purchase of  AI outfit Xnor.ai is leaving Wyze's affordable cameras without the people detection feature.

Apple must do what it's told

The fruity cargo cult Apple could find itself at the sharp end of an EU move to  require chargers to fit all mobile phones and portable electronic devices.

We helped you, now help us

President Donald Trump lashed out at Apple and slammed the iPhone maker for what he said was its refusal to unlock phones used by terrorists while benefiting from government help on trade.