Trump claims DNC hack conducted by a fattie sitting on his bed
Published in News


Not my friend Tsar Putin


In last night’s debate, comedy candidate Donald Trump claimed that the hack of the democrats was carried out by a “400 pound" fatty sitting on his bed.”

Putin denies Democratic party hack
Published in News
Monday, 05 September 2016 12:15

Putin denies Democratic party hack


But says it was a “public service”

Tsar Vladimir Putin has denied that his elite team of hackers were behind the hack of the Democratic Party, but does say who ever did it was carrying out a public service.

Tsar Putin wants backdoors on everything
Published in News


Two weeks to get rear access

The Tsar of all the Russias,  Tsar Vladimir Putin is desperate to investigate the back doors of western software makers and has ordered them to grant access to his mighty spooks.

Moscow Russian to connect dead to wi-fi
Published in Mobiles
Thursday, 10 December 2015 10:28

Moscow Russian to connect dead to wi-fi


Every body gets it

Authorities in Tsar Putin’s Moscow have been busy tackling the grave problem of coverage black-spots by sticking wi-fi in the city’s cemeteries.

Russians take on Google
Published in News
Monday, 16 November 2015 10:11

Russians take on Google


Revolution

Russia's biggest search site Yandex has asked the European Commission to investigate Google's Android practices in the European Union.

Microsoft sneaking into Putin's Russia
Published in News
Tuesday, 13 October 2015 12:39

Microsoft sneaking into Putin's Russia


All it cost was Bing

Software king of the world Microsoft has worked out a clever way to get its Windows 10 accepted in Tsar Putin's Russia without much trouble.

Tsar Putin orders Google to ditch Android business model
Published in News


Or face a huge fine

Tsar Putin has decided that Google is going to have to ditch its current Android business model if it wants to continue to work in Mother Russia.

Russians behind western malware attacks
Published in News
Thursday, 17 September 2015 10:40

Russians behind western malware attacks


But US blames China

It would appear that while the US has been blaming China for all its cyber break-ins it appears to be ignoring Tsar Putin's elite hacking team for the last seven years.

Russia banking on home grown chips
Published in Processors
Monday, 11 May 2015 10:34

Russia banking on home grown chips


Putin on the Bits

A Russian firm announced its intention to build its own homegrown CPUs as part of a cunning plan to keep the Americans from spying on the glorious Empire of Tsar Putin and oil oligarchs.

Assange grassed Snowden to the NSA
Published in News
Wednesday, 15 April 2015 11:44

Assange grassed Snowden to the NSA


Don't look at him, Look at me 

Wikileaks boss Julian Assange complicated Edward Snowden's escape from Russia by tipping off the NSA with a false rumour about the Bolivian President.