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Apple comes up with daft airbag idea

by on22 November 2011

apple

Easier than coming up with a gadget that works

Fruity cargo-cult Apple, still desperate to prove that it is actually inventing things rather than just suing other more innovative outfits, has come up with an airbag for iPads.

Apparently the iPad is more fragile than a butterfly's wing and cannot handle being dropped. Rather than making the gear more rugged Apple has come up with an airbag with will automatically inflate if the device is dropped.

We guess then you will have to take it to your Apple genius bar and pay to have the airbag reset. Still it will be good news for all those Apple fanbois who are becoming increasingly desperate to find new ways to give their money to Jobs' Mob for absolutely no reason.

Anyway the problem is caused by the fact that Apple thinks it is a brilliant idea to make stuff out of glass, which shatters when it is dropped. The answer is not to use something more sensible, but to build a tunable shock mount that would sit between the glass and the body of the device. This shock mount would inflate when the device's accelerometer senses that the phone or tablet is falling. An actuator within the device would suck in the cover glass as it accelerates toward earth, protecting it from damage.  

What could go wrong? Fall over and your iPhone or iPad will think it is doomed and hit the inflation button. Likewise you would not want to take it sking.


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