Featured Articles

Nvidia Shield 2 shows up in AnTuTu

Nvidia Shield 2 shows up in AnTuTu

Nvidia’s original Shield console launched last summer to mixed reviews. It went on sale in the US and so far Nvidia…

More...
AMD CSO John Byrne talks ARM

AMD CSO John Byrne talks ARM

We had a chance to talk about AMD’s upcoming products with John Byrne, Chief Sales Officer, AMD. We covered a number…

More...
AMD Chief Sales Officer thinks GPU leadership is critical

AMD Chief Sales Officer thinks GPU leadership is critical

We had a chance to talk to John Byrne who spent the last two years as Senior Vice President and Chief…

More...
OpenPlus One $299 5.5-inch Full HD phone

OpenPlus One $299 5.5-inch Full HD phone

OnePlus is one of the few small companies that might disrupt the Android phone market, dominated by giant outfits like Samsung.…

More...
KFA2 GTX 780 Ti Hall Of Fame reviewed

KFA2 GTX 780 Ti Hall Of Fame reviewed

KFA2 gained a lot of overclocking experience with the GTX 780 Hall of Fame (HOF), which we had a chance to…

More...
Frontpage Slideshow | Copyright © 2006-2010 orks, a business unit of Nuevvo Webware Ltd.
Tuesday, 31 December 2013 12:16

Apple fanboy stabs dad for heresy

Written by Nick Farrell



Gave him the wrong Christmas present

An Apple fanboy pulled a knife on his dad for failing to satisfy his religious cravings for a new iPhone this Christmas. The Apple fanboys' religion depends on a regular upgrade of their iPhone, even if it looks and acts pretty much the same as the last one. If they fail in this, their religious purpose, they will be banished from the Walled Garden of Apple Eden and be ritually mocked by their friends.

So needless to say 18-year-old Brockton, Massachusetts resident Alexander Torres was perfectly justified when he failed to get the iPhone he was expecting for Christmas. He pulled a small pocket knife on his father and had to be restrained by multiple family members until the local plod arrived. The father wasn't injured during the scuffle. However, Torres's 24-year-old stepbrother had to be transported to a nearby medical centre to be treated for unspecified injuries.

Torres was arrested and charged with “assault and battery with a dangerous weapon” as well as “assault and battery and malicious damage to a motor vehicle.” It has not been a matter of Santa forgetting Torres because because he has been naughty instead of nice. We suspect the bearded one was just not sure if shallow, stupid, self-obsessed, tendency to think brand is more important than technology, counts as naughty or not. Pulling a knife on your old man probably is the clincher that Santa needed.

The Tame Apple press can’t work out if Torres had received another brand of smartphone for Christmas, which would be justifiable attempted homicide or if it had not arrived in time which was just the Will of Jobs.

Lots of Apple fanboys have been disappointed this Christmas because UPS and Fedex were unable to deliver tons of late Christmas gifts due to the last minute holiday rush. It fortunately means that the standards of the world will not be lowered for a few more days.

Nick Farrell

E-mail: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
blog comments powered by Disqus

To be able to post comments please log-in with Disqus

 

Facebook activity

Latest Commented Articles

Recent Comments