Apple admits its new Watch 3 is borked
Published in Wearables


Wants you to pay for it any way

Fruity Cargo Cult Apple has admitted that its new Apple 3 watch is borked but it is going to sell it to Apple fanboys at the end of the week anyway.

Feature phone users are a weird bunch
Published in Mobiles

 
Dinosaurs yes, broke no

A new survey pours cold water on the myth that people use feature phones because they can't afford a smartphone.

Fitbit is the king of wearables
Published in News


Apple fails miserably, despite cuckoo press stories 


You might not be aware of it, because the Tame Apple Press is going on an offensive, but Apple is losing the wearable’s market to Fitbit.

Samsung plans two new smartwatches
Published in Wearables


Gear S3 Frontier and S3 Classic out next month

Samsung has announced that it will be releasing the Galaxy Gear S3 smartwatch next month.

iWatch banned from British Cabinet
Published in News


Michael Gove was too insecure 

The UK government has banned Apple's iWatch from its government Cabinet meetings because they can be easily knocked over by the Russians.

Smartwatches fail to catch on
Published in Wearables


Now is not the hour

While the fruity tax-dodger Apple does its best to convince the world that its Smartwatch 2 is any different from the expensive chocolate teapot which was the earlier model, it appears that other more “cutting edge” manufacturers are giving up on the tech.

Apple has booked the hall for its iPhone 7 launch
Published in Mobiles


Be prepared for a snooze

Fruity cargo cult Apple has booked the hall for one of its Nuremberg style rallies on September 7 where US journalists will shame themselves by cheering for products that they know are actually pants.

Next iWatch will need an iPhone
Published in Wearables


Inovation, Apple has heard of it

When it was first released, the iWatch was slammed for needing an iPhone to work. After all, there is no point having an iWatch if you have to carry your phone around too.  Now, two years later, the crack inovators at Apple still have not managed to fix the problem.

New Apple Watch will be buried in iPhone 7 release
Published in Wearables


Nothing to see here,  move on please

A Chinese analyst claims that Apple will release the “new and improved” iWatch when all the coverage is going to be focused on the iPhone 7.

Apple expects your gear to be dead in three years
Published in News


It does not matter how much you paid

It might have cost you an arm and a leg, but Apple does not expect its shiny toys to last longer than three to four years.