Apple shamed into upgrading its Mac Pro range
Published in Notebooks


Can’t take the jibes from Fudzilla

For a while now we have been mocking the fruity cargo cult Apple for being unable to upgrade its Macbook Pro. Now it seems that Jobs Mob has suddenly woken up to the fact that you can’t claim you are cutting edge while peddling four-year-old stock.

New Apple Watch will be buried in iPhone 7 release
Published in Wearables


Nothing to see here,  move on please

A Chinese analyst claims that Apple will release the “new and improved” iWatch when all the coverage is going to be focused on the iPhone 7.

Apple’s TV programming hits new low
Published in News
Wednesday, 10 August 2016 10:35

Apple’s TV programming hits new low


Front people named as secret minutes revealed

The fruity cargo cult, Apple’s mission to lower the standards of the world hit a new “high” today after it announced which celebs were going to host their new self-reverential app developer “reality” show. Gwyneth Paltrow, will.i.am have been named as the celebrities which will add weight to “Planet of the Apps.” It seems such a strange decision that we asked one of our Apple deep throats to find us the minutes of the meeting where it was made. We provide it verbatim:

London’s coppers stuck in Windows XP time warp
Published in News


27,000 PCs still run the ancient software

More than 27,000 PCs in use by London’s Metropolitan Police are running Windows XP despite an IT modernisation programme and fears that it makes them vulnerable to hackers.

"Arrogant" Apple falls foul of Tsar Putin
Published in Mobiles
Tuesday, 09 August 2016 12:16

"Arrogant" Apple falls foul of Tsar Putin


Price fixing allegations

Fruity cargo cult Apple's arrogant attitude to its business partners might have earned it a price fixing court case in Tsar Putin's Russia.

Austrian actor pushes South Korean products in USA
Published in News

Dancing with the devils

Samsung is spending millions of dollars pushing its upcoming Galaxy Note 7 tablet in the USA and thinks that hiring Austrian film star Christopher Waltz to mock how busy citizens already are will help persuade Americans to favour a Korean product over Apple offerings.

India will not save Apple's iPhone cash cow
Published in Mobiles


It is just too expensive

Apple’s hopes that it might prolong the life of its sacred cash cow the iPhone in India are proving false.

Apple needs to stop selling four year old computers
Published in News


Fanboys are revolting

A while back Apple took the Nintendo out of those who owned five year old PCs calling them “sad people”. However, the fruity cargo cult is now peddling “new” computers which are that august age and even Apple fanboys are screaming “hey we are not THAT sad.”

Big Tech is saving the US economy
Published in News
Thursday, 04 August 2016 12:05

Big Tech is saving the US economy


Just a pity they are not paying tax

The US economy might be being propped up by the success of technology heavyweights.

Apple helped run Uber out of China
Published in News
Thursday, 04 August 2016 12:00

Apple helped run Uber out of China


Hard to find a good guy in this story

Apple's billion dollar investment in car-hailing app Didi Chuxing in May helped kick Uber out of China.