Published in Mobiles

Kid breaks into his mum’s iPhone X

by on20 November 2017


Super-secure tech destroyed by a ten-year-old

A 10 year old kid broke into his mother’s over-priced, super-secure  iPhone X just by looking at it.

Attaullah Malik and Sana Sherwani made that discovery earlier this month, when their fifth grade son, Ammar Malik, walked into the bedroom of their Staten Island home to admire their new pair of iPhone Xs just after they’d set up Face ID.

Like most annoying Apple users who were unable to justify the fact that they wasted money on a pointless shiny toy, the kid’s parents lectured him about how super cool the new phone was because it was super secure.

“There’s no way you’re getting access to this phone”, the older Malik remembers his wife telling her son.

Ammar did not plunge his pudding spoon into her eyes, which is acceptable behaviour from a child who has to daily suffer from the cruel gods which caused him to incarnate in a family of Apple fanboys who managed to find partners that would breed with them. Instead, Ammar did the next best thing – he showed his parents that the device was about as secure as a tent in a force ten gale.

Malik thrust the phone before the poor kid’s eyes to show off how beautiful it looked and a split second after he looked at it, the phone unlocked.

The security functions of the iPhone surrendered as the 10 year old cracker looked at it. Apparently Apple designers did not expect people to look at iPhones other than what they had paid for.

Ten year old Ammar thought it was hilarious, but his parents' universe collapsed. After all, they had been wasting all this cash on a product, and Ammar could, at a moment’s notice, just go in and listen to their Coldplay collection whenever he liked.

Malik told Wired: “My wife and I text all the time and there might be something we don’t want him to see. Now my wife has to delete her texts when there's something she doesn’t want Ammar to look at."

Malik claimed that he did not want to disable Face ID because it was “very convenient” - after all he has to use it whenever he wants to switch the phone on. However, it is a hassle if a ten year old boy can access your phone.

Since returning the phone and buying a cheaper one which works is not an option for two Apple fanboys, might we suggest selling the child for medical experiments? After all, the child is insulting the true Apple religion by having that face. Using Apple's religious philosophy, you just upgrade the kid for one with a different face.

Last modified on 20 November 2017
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