Its official, Apple’s Vision Pro is a turkey
Published in News

Could not even sell 100,000

It arrived over-hyped and obscenely overpriced, yet the fruity cargo cult Apple was convinced its users were stupid enough to buy it. However, it turns out that not even Apple fanboys were that dumb to splash out on the Vision Pro.  

Apple confirms you need an upgrade for its “Apple Intelligence"
Published in Mobiles

If you are that intelligent you probably will not

The fruity cargo cult Apple has told its legions of fanboys that they will never get any AI features unless they fork out more dosh for the latest machines.

Apple scores good AI deal with OpenAI
Published in News
Thursday, 13 June 2024 11:24

Apple scores good AI deal with OpenAI

Please give it to use for free while we work out a way to do you over

While Microsoft had to pay $10 billion for its OpenAI deal, the fruity cargo cult Apple seems to be getting it for free.

Apple invented AI
Published in AI
Monday, 10 June 2024 11:33

Apple invented AI

It is called Apple Intelligence

The Fruity Cargo Cult Apple is trying to hide its long-standing lagging in the AI race by pretending to have invented it.

Apple starts sending WWDC 2024 invites
Published in News
Thursday, 30 May 2024 09:46

Apple starts sending WWDC 2024 invites

iOS 18 with heavy focus on AI

Apple has sent out invites for its annual developers conference (WWDC) scheduled for June 10. The event will be held at Apple Park and will be all about iOS 18 and its heavy focus on AI

Apple thought about ripping off Tetris
Published in News

At least on a prototype

Fruity cargo cult Apple saw the success of the computer game Tetris and said “we will be having some of that” and bashed out a clone.

Microsoft ready clean Mac’s out-of-date clock
Published in PC Hardware

New ARM Snapdragon X will make Macs look as dated as Stevenson’s rocket

Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella says that while the fruity cargo cult Apple had done a splendid job on its latest Mac, it was going to be outdated by the new windows optimised laptops coming from Acer, ASUS, Dell, HP, Lenovo, and Samsung in the next four weeks.

Apple and Starlink ally to take on security complaints
Published in News

An attack on one is an attack on the other

Fruity cargo cult Apple has teamed up with Elon [look at me] Musk’s Starlink to see off a report which shows them both up as a little insecure.

Apple's 'Big Brother' tactics stifle Euro tech freedom
Published in News

EU needs to check the fine print

In a classic display of Apple's 'my way or the highway' attitude, the tech giant has finally bent the knee to European law, but not without a sneaky catch that's got third-party browser developers in a right tizz.

Tame Apple Press claims Qualcomm’s better chip is a spoiler
Published in News

Nothing can really beat Apple

The Fruity Cargo Cult-owned press has started rumours claiming that the Snapdragon 8 Gen 4, expected to be announced in October, will have “spoiler” specifications and the final products will not be as good as Jobs’ Mob.