“Evil rating” level up

The US Food and Drugs Administration (FDA) has decided that despite a high death rate amongst his animal test subjects, it is ok for Elon [look at me] Musk to test installing chips into human brains.

Charlton Heston puts his vest on

Despite approval setbacks and killing more apes than Charlton Heston in Beneath the Planet of the Apes supreme Twit Elon [look at me] Musk wants to experiment on humans.

Shedloads of tests still need to be done

Elon [look at me] Musk’s plans to install chips into everyone’s brains have been set back by those pesky government officials who have a few questions about how he planned to do it.

Neuralink caused needless suffering and deaths

Supreme Twit Elon [look at me] Musk’s Neuralink is under federal investigation for animal-welfare violations amid internal staff complaints that its animal testing is being rushed, causing needless suffering and deaths.

Only killed 15 out of 23 test subjects

Supreme Twit Elon [look at me] Musk claims that his brain-control interfaces (BCI) startup, Neuralink is only a few months away from installing the chip into humans.