The companies promise that the announcement will connect owners of pets and the world+dog “in a way never seen before in the UK”. According to the invitation - unfortunately we can’t attend - this will “keep your pets in the palm of your hand”.

Let’s hope your pet isn’t a St Bernard or even an Elk. You might not believe it but some Newfoundlanders keep Moose - not mice - as pets. You're right not to believe it, although we wouldn't rule it out of the questions we have, but won't be able to ask.

We can only speculate that the announcement will be something like an internet collar that lets you find out where your pet is - if she or he decides to do a runner.  We’re also going to miss what the PRs call an “exclusive VIP goody bag” with “exciting samples”.

Sorry about that, Acer. Please send me the press release on Monday.