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Apple buys machine learning team

by on23 September 2016


Wants a data snuffler

Fruity tax-dodging cargo-cult Apple has just written a check for an Indian data snuffler called Tuplejump.

Details of the deal are more classified than the US nuclear codes, and Jobs’ Mob has even ordered Tuplejump to pull its webpage so no-one can find out what it has bought. Fortunately for us, there is such a thing as a Wayback Machine which helped us find what Jobs’ Mob had used the money it saved paying European tax.

Tuplejump said then that it realised that the volume of data that businesses generate was becoming unwieldy.

“A new set of technologies to handle this huge amounts of data cropped up. We were one of the early adopters of these ‘big-data’ technologies. Having helped Fortune 500 companies adopt these technologies we quickly realised how complicated they were and how much simpler they could get.”

It wanted to simplify data management technologies and make it easier to use.

“We are building technology that is simple to use, scalable and will allow people to ask difficult questions on huge datasets.”

Apple became interested in an opensource project called “FiloDB” that Tuplejump was building to efficiently apply machine learning concepts and analytics to massive amounts of complex data right as it streamed in.

It is unlikely that FiloDB will survive as an opensource project, although it recently was pushed to its own repository and seen newly committed code has been pulled into the project within the last few weeks. That might change when the legendarily proprietary Apple takes over.

Last modified on 23 September 2016
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