Texas republican Louie Gohmert thinks that the space-time continuum can be altered by an unusual paradigm.
Gohmert seems to believe that Jennifer Eberlein, the associate deputy chief of the Forest Service, can figure out how to overcome the effects of ever-present effects of gravity and physics to fit the whims of humanity.
According to Wikipedia, Gohmert attends Green Acres Baptist Church in Tyler, where he has served as a deacon and teaches Sunday school. He is a Southern Baptist. He and his wife Kathy have three daughters.
Let's hope he understands the the value of pi. And that when he teaches at Sunday school he teaches the kids the 12 times table.
The story, which we've re-interpreted, is here. He could easily alter the orbits, if he persuades the authorities, by sending multiple thermo-nuclear devices onto the Moon, and onto the Earth. If he targets China, he could probably send his three daughters into paradise before they learned 12 times 12 is 144.