If only there were some management software it could use to help out

SAP, the maker of expensive esoteric software, which no-one really knows what it does, has told its shareholders not to expect a major improvement in margins before next year.

More exits at SAP

The maker of expensive esoteric business software which no one is sure what it does, SAP, appears to be having trouble keeping senior managers.

Rushing for the cloud

The maker of esoteric management software, which no one is really is sure what it does, has told its top programmers to clear out their desks.  The move is part of a restructuring which will put SAP software on the cloud.

Needs more expensive staff to do something but no one is sure what

The maker of expensive business software which is so esoteric few companies know what it actually does but insists they must have it is hiring staff.

Pre-empting an IPO

The maker of expensive business software which no one really understands, SAP, has written an $8 billion cheque for Qualtrics International.

Share and enjoy

SAP,  Microsoft and Adobe have formed a data alliance that they say will make it easier for clients running their applications to get a better overview of the customer.

Mostly exploiting a failure to patch

At least a dozen companies and government agencies have been targeted, and thousands more are exposed to data breaches by hackers exploiting old security flaws in Oracle and SAP management software, two cybersecurity firms and Homeland Security have warned.

What is the sound of one BAP instance of an SAP system containing the enqueue server and the message server clapping?

The maker of expensive software which no one is sure what it does has done well by turning to the meditation technique of mindfulness.

Strategic transition in Callidus

The maker of expensive management software which is so esoteric few people know what it does has decided to invest $2.4 billion to get more practical about clouds.

Incomprehensible meets the intractable

The software King of the World is teaming up with the maker of expensive business software which no one knows exactly what it does to put everything into clouds.