Plan to replace real money with imaginary money a bit silly

The software King of the World, Microsoft, has decided not to invest in the Bitcoin Ponzi scheme, which would have transferred some of its real assets to the imaginary currency.

Claims it could be used to sell digital content

The fruity cargo cult Apple has ordered Damus, a decentralised social networking app backed by Twitter co-founder Jack Dorsey, to be cast forth from its walled garden of delights for committing sins against the true and holy church.

They told us we would be as rich as Berlusconi

Italy is reeling from a Bitcoin-based financial scam and what seems to have gotten their goat was that it was an Italian company behind it.

But its fanboy president can’t help but buy more of it

While the Bitcoin ponzi scheme has been crashing and burning, one of its key fanboy’s El Salvador’s president cannot admit he has made a mistake.

President tells them to sling their hook

The US government has been told to sling its hook by Bitcoin fanboy El Salvador President Nayib Bukele.

Mystery solved

Linus Torvalds has squashed an internet rumour that he is Bitcoin creator Satoshi Nakamoto.

Because citadels historically work well in Texas

Texas governor candidate Don Huffines said he is "committed to making Texas the citadel for bitcoin and has released a plan detailing the effort.

Bank of England warns

The Bank of England has said that bitcoin could be "worthless" and people investing in the digital currency should be prepared to lose everything.

At this rate the Mexicans will not want it back

Texas, which has one of the most dodgy power grids in the US, is about to be hit by a surge in demand for electricity that's twice the size of Austin's as part of local government policy.

Done too quick 

The move by El Salvador to move to Bitcoin as legal tender has been greeted with praise and brickbats across the financial markets.